Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Invasion of the orange people from.. down your street!



So, this is something unusual. I'm making a more traditional blog today because something sparked my ire in an uncommon way the other day. I was sitting at home, enjoying my usual snack of a pizza pop wrapped in bacon when my sister lets of a shriek of distress; my mother had just forbidden her to go to one of those many chemical/artificial tanning salons. This made my mind spin, recalling all the people I knew who used them, and they all had one thing in common. They were orange. Not as is they had a slight tinge; they were so orange is was a difficult matter to simply not walk up to them and say, "Why Madam, what a pleasant shade of pumpkin orange you are, perhaps you might like to join me for a malt?" Except that wasn't true at all, it just irritated me. Normal suntans, leave a person with a simply darker complexion, and that -still- isn't all that good for you, what with melanoma and all. But these artificial tanning places; what do they actually spray on you? It could be like old McDonald's grease or something. I personally would like to keep my number of arms at an even two, and avoid horrible mutations from exposure to god knows what. But even that aside, how attractive can orange possibly be? I, personally, don't even understand the attraction of tans in general. But orange; is it some form of tree-frog mating shtick? Like, the brighter-coloured you are, the more likely you'll find a mate? This is ever a mystery to me. But in any event, I explained my position to my sister, who started screaming at me as well, and then fled off to her room. At least I tried. But remember folks: friends don't let friends become orange. If mankind was meant to look like a vegitable, we'd have seeds.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Keep up the good work.